personal reflection

When i was offered the chance to join HNC, i almost puked. Bit extreme, i know but bare with me. I had just finish my first official course in the creative industries, had shit grades from high school, near 30 and with almost no connection or back ground in film or television. The offer put me ahead a year, i was applying for the Nq course so HNC was very unexpected and caught me off guard. I remember walking out, Having that feeling you get after a fight, When the adrenaline has worn off and you are just left a shaking wreak of a person.

When i started my first week, i literally didn’t know how to use a mac or Mahara, Honestly had no idea. Imagine trying to learn a new language from a high tech race of space beings. I couldn’t edit or use any software for that matter as well now i think of it. At that point, i think my son had more experience with computers than me. I never touched a real camera before. I never directed anything. I never acted in anything. I was well out of my comfort zone, the comfort zone was a dot from where i was.

First day, First class, Tommy in Rannoch, Creative industries. I was being told about LO1,2 and 3. What the fuck were these? They were due before Christmas! Ok, maybe this was the wrong course for me, i’ll give it a couple weeks and see what happens.

Day 2, i find out that the blonde woman wasn’t coming back and she was a photographer. Shit, i’m Screwed here. Script class on the Tuesday was the only class i knew what was actually going on.

I ended up sitting next to Darren, who helped me understand editing. He was and is a good guy. He pretty much babied me, let me film a wee music video for him, do a wee sketch with him. These things might seem trivial but to me it was learning.

Gradually i started to pick things up, by End of first semester i could edit enough to pass my outcomes, which was a great feeling at the time.

My camera work didn’t actually start to improve until Michael gave me access to a NQ photography Page From there it was Conor. Conor showed me great photos he took, told me how to edit them, gave me links and tutorials to watch.

Honestly without Conor and Darren, i don’t know how far i would have got.

Now this isn’t a whole thing about me thanking people, because i need a little credit myself for sticking with it and actually wanting to learn, But those two students deserve a mention.

After Christmas i was a bit more adapt to my new environment, Far from expert but i could now survive on my own. Skipping forward, I’m Just gonna assume by now you know i made it through HNC with a B. I was fucking happy with a b considering everything on the course was totally new to me. Definitely thrilled about my B. i earn that. I finished.

HND, By this point, i could hold my own with most of the class. Of course some people are better than me, i’m not here to be the best at anything. I here to change my future and HND was a chance to do that.

HND was fucking tough, but it was nowhere near as hard as carry a 100 3x2 slabs all day. That shit is hard. I manage to use this through all my work, if i ever thought something was hard, i’d think “ is it as hard as carrying those slabs?” I think not. Head down and work your arse off, Always remain ahead of your work so you don’t have to play catch up on subjects. Deliver Learning outcome on time, everytime. This was my mental status about HND, just work hard.

I think some of the hardest bits about HND was people dropping out. Mainly Darren and Sean. I enjoyed Sean, maybe not the best student but i definitely had time for him. I hope to one day film the music video i pitched to him, might not break any records but i would be fun.

Over the past two years, i learned a lot about myself. I learned that i refuse to give up, genuinely the word quit doesn’t exist to me. I know i could still fail, at something. I learned that on my graded unit essay. Thank fuck i got to redo that. Always read criteria, the lesson was learnt that day. To quote michael “ uni will not let me away with that”

Over the past two years, i went from being a person who dreamed of being creative to a person who was creative and did creative things with other creatives. I honestly never thought i could do anything i have did on this course. If you told a younger version of me, say the ten year old version who told everyone in a library one day that he wanted to make movies when he was older, that when was older he would be making movies. Bet you that kid would smile. It only took me to the age of 30 before i realised i could do it.

Now, almost done. Napier in the Bag. The future is out there for me, i can honestly feel it. I will keep this mindset going forward and i will always look back at this time in my life, this moment was the moment it started for me. Or maybe i’m just a crazy dick sitting at a computer alone…

Anyway Thanks Michael and thanks Alan. You said it was a steeper learning curve on the course and i now believe you, but i loved it.

James Reid